Halloween Costumes for Normal People
Every year it is the same thing. I have grand ideas about the Best Costume Ever and husband has no interest in dressing up. Last year we were new to our neighborhood, so we threw a Halloween party, which forced us to dress up (though in slightly lame costumes). This year we are once again throwing a party, and we agree that we need to try a little harder. Our costumes need to look like we tried.
And then the idea came to me. Charlie wants to be Spiderman. Will is going to wear Charlie's old Superman costume. How cute would it be if we were all different super heroes? We could be like the Drawn Together family, all living under one roof, except not all perverted and weird.
Hubby was totally on board. For the first time ever, our costumes were gonna rock.
Then we started shopping online, and this is what we found.
Do you see the way it is hugging his package, so gently, yet firmly?
And for my costume...
... Am I going to save the world, or feed them?
Other options?
What are those spikey things on her arms? This one really bothered me. Let's look at the real batgirl.
While she is sexy, there is no vinyl involved. She actually looks respectful. Classy. But still totally doable.
Hubby says, "Why don't they call the costumes what they really are? Like Brazen Whore?"
Now don't get me wrong. I have no problem with sexiness. There is a part of me that likes to dress slutty sometimes (it helps rectify many days of wiping noses and butts). Showing off what you have can be freeing. And since I'm a nursing mom, I could just go, like, 5 hours without nursing, and BAM, I can overflow just like the rest of them (hopefully the belly fat won't cancel that out). But why? I mean, on one hand, most of the people coming over are thirty- to forty-somethings with kids and normal jobs, and half our guests will be under the age of four. So really, it would be a little embarassing.
Even if (and this is the other hand) the two of us went out as a couple, with normal people, what is the point of participating in the who can be sluttiest competition? I am over it. I just want a decent costume.
Next idea: the nurse from Kill Bill 2. The costume is basic but still interesting and not prepackaged. Spooky but not dumb. Just a nurse's outfit with few blood splatters, eye patch, knife behind the back. Perfect! But one of the neighborhood moms dressed as a nurse last year, and all the men were all atwitter about how they could see through to her thong. Shockingly, she won the costume contest, even though she only wore a plain white nursey dress and heels. So that option is out for me with this group, even though this nurse is way cooler.
Next and perhaps final idea: Napoleon Dynamite. He can be Napoleon, and I can be the 80's girlfriend. I need the fold-down acid wash jeans, the nurse shirt (?), homemade bracelets, pink Reebok hi-tops, fanny pack, sideways ponytail. I love the idea but that means I need to go to like 4 Goodwills in order to accomplish all this. Who has time for this? Let me rephrase. Who with children has time for this?
I need ideas. Anyone?
Every year it is the same thing. I have grand ideas about the Best Costume Ever and husband has no interest in dressing up. Last year we were new to our neighborhood, so we threw a Halloween party, which forced us to dress up (though in slightly lame costumes). This year we are once again throwing a party, and we agree that we need to try a little harder. Our costumes need to look like we tried.
And then the idea came to me. Charlie wants to be Spiderman. Will is going to wear Charlie's old Superman costume. How cute would it be if we were all different super heroes? We could be like the Drawn Together family, all living under one roof, except not all perverted and weird.
Hubby was totally on board. For the first time ever, our costumes were gonna rock.
Then we started shopping online, and this is what we found.
Do you see the way it is hugging his package, so gently, yet firmly?
And for my costume...
... Am I going to save the world, or feed them?
Other options?
What are those spikey things on her arms? This one really bothered me. Let's look at the real batgirl.
While she is sexy, there is no vinyl involved. She actually looks respectful. Classy. But still totally doable.
Hubby says, "Why don't they call the costumes what they really are? Like Brazen Whore?"
Now don't get me wrong. I have no problem with sexiness. There is a part of me that likes to dress slutty sometimes (it helps rectify many days of wiping noses and butts). Showing off what you have can be freeing. And since I'm a nursing mom, I could just go, like, 5 hours without nursing, and BAM, I can overflow just like the rest of them (hopefully the belly fat won't cancel that out). But why? I mean, on one hand, most of the people coming over are thirty- to forty-somethings with kids and normal jobs, and half our guests will be under the age of four. So really, it would be a little embarassing.
Even if (and this is the other hand) the two of us went out as a couple, with normal people, what is the point of participating in the who can be sluttiest competition? I am over it. I just want a decent costume.
Next idea: the nurse from Kill Bill 2. The costume is basic but still interesting and not prepackaged. Spooky but not dumb. Just a nurse's outfit with few blood splatters, eye patch, knife behind the back. Perfect! But one of the neighborhood moms dressed as a nurse last year, and all the men were all atwitter about how they could see through to her thong. Shockingly, she won the costume contest, even though she only wore a plain white nursey dress and heels. So that option is out for me with this group, even though this nurse is way cooler.
Next and perhaps final idea: Napoleon Dynamite. He can be Napoleon, and I can be the 80's girlfriend. I need the fold-down acid wash jeans, the nurse shirt (?), homemade bracelets, pink Reebok hi-tops, fanny pack, sideways ponytail. I love the idea but that means I need to go to like 4 Goodwills in order to accomplish all this. Who has time for this? Let me rephrase. Who with children has time for this?
I need ideas. Anyone?
posted by Andrea at 7:47 PM
4 Comments:
the daryl hanna in kill bill costume would be great-- not too much to buy, sexy but cool.
please please- none of those "adult" packaged costumes with the porn stars posing on the front of them! i agree with hubby. that old school cat woman has got more grrrrrl in her little pinkie than those silly packages.
i wrote a blog about my costume for this year- it is kinda obscure.
are you guys doing a couple thing? last year j & i were simon and garfunkel. how about sonny & cher (easy for him, you get to get all dolled up)?
I've noticed some very whorish costumes out there and was really shocked by them actually. I was planning a post about it.
Anyway, how about Bonnie and Clyde? Is that too generic? Do you have any costume stores near you? Go in and ask them for ideas. We did that a couple years ago and I got a great Cleopatra costume. I was actually a couple months pregnant at the time and the costume was great. It was sexy without being slutty. Had a long flowing gown etc. Hey, how about you be Cleopatra and hubby can dress up as your "servant", feed you grapes and fan you with leaves??!
MoTR, Yeah, why don't you go ahead and suggest that to him. Good idea.
I'm visiting from Mommy off the Record....hubby and I are going as Earl and Joy Hickey off My Name is Earl....its been fun looking for the outfit...I have been to 2 Goodwills/////
Good Luck...I enjoy making people laugh on Halloween......I have short shorts and a tank top that says Naughty across the boobs.....high high heels that are clear.....a sucker and gum...suntan panty hose cause...who the hell is tan this time of year.....and going to wear my hair in dog ears....my hubby is wearing a flannel shirt...wranglers..from goodwill....his work boots..and a list in his pocket...we also bought a mustache....and will either buy a wig or mess his hair up....good luck....let me know what you go as.
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