11.03.2006

Did I take this too far?

A year ago, when I had just started running the daycare, I watched only one child and regularly dipped into my savings account to cover my bills. After 6 weeks of this, I was finally hired by a mother to watch my second daycare baby. I was ecstatic. The baby seemed easy, and he was the same age as the other baby I watched. Finally, my business was growing.

A week after watching her infant son, she mysteriously said she would no longer need care, and three days later, her check bounced. My checking account balance was so low that five of my checks bounced, and then the bank charged me some additional “inconvenience” fees.

I called her a few (like twenty) times. The first time we talked, she said she was so sorry. Someone had bounced a check to her, and it caused her account to be overdrawn, which caused her check to me to bounce. Her theory was plausible since the same thing had almost happened to me with her check. And besides, I liked her.

The problem would be fixed by the end of the week, she said. Fine, I said, bring me cash at the end of the week – enough to cover the original amount plus all my bank fees.

I transferred more money from my savings account and called her at the end of the week. She said that since her bank was out of state, she was not able to get cash out of it. I later looked at her returned check in my hands, and saw the bank's local address... roughly 5 minutes away.

I called her a few days later. Hubby lost his new job. And her commission from a prominent real estate agency hadn't come through yet. Or something. I lost track after awhile.

After that, she stopped answering her phone. So I sent her one certified letter that said I would take her to court if she did not pay me in full within two weeks.

Two service agencies could not serve her. I could not take her to court without her first being served court papers. She was elusive. The clean-cut, preppy blonde with the respectable husband and cute baby was eluding service agencies. My due date for my baby was approaching, and I thought about the prospect of being in court, a breastfeeding mom with leaky breasts and low amounts of sleep, and I cringed at the thought.

So I turned her over to a collection agency. I signed some sort of contract and sent them her check. They told me I was entitled to the amount of the check plus five measly dollars. I went for it because I liked the idea of teaching her a lesson. It wasn't about the money anymore.

The original check was only for $230, and the collection agency is now after her for over $1,000 dollars, an amount that will be on her credit report for seven years, even if she somehow pays it off.

Months later, I still have not seen any money. Bored one day, I googled her. She is being sued by Pizza Hut. Twice. She is being sued by a company that cuts commission checks for real estate agents. Sadliest of all, she is being sued by Check Into Cash. Check Into Cash, people.

I feel guilty. In spite of my occasional potty mouth and penchant for shallow material things, I consider myself a Christian. And, suing people and sending them to collection agencies isn't exactly a Christian thing to do, especially when the primary motive is revenge (and also considering that I don't need that money anymore). And here is a lady with a baby, who may be at risk of losing her house, who might not be able to afford basics like non-generic diapers, who has to decide which bill to pay. And I can totally imagine being in her shoes even though I have never been there. I feel guilty.

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7 Comments:

Blogger Kyla said...

She made her bed....now she is lying in it. You don't accidentally piss ALL of those people all enough for them to ALL sue you. You, my dear, are doing the right thing. If she had said, "I don't have the money, I'm sorry." it would have been one thing (perhaps a mom choosing which bill to pay, like you said) but she has taken it MUCH further than that...and none of it is your fault, and you shouldn't feel guilty.

7:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't feel guilty. You didn't know. And you didn't do it to her. You offered her a service that she couldn't keep up with. She backed down from her end of the deal. You deserve that money. Plus more!!!!

3:29 AM  
Blogger Me said...

... I would feel guilty too. I realize that people's lives on the 'outside' are not what they seem to be. I would wonder what she was going through in her life and her marriage that is causing all these problems. I think you did the right thing - but I'd feel guilty as well.

(Pizza Hut is suing her? That is just.... weird?)

4:37 AM  
Blogger Andrea said...

RE: Pizza Hut... The lady from the collections agency let that one slip (I'm pretty sure that is confidential info that I shouldn't know about). She said that when people get really desperate, they'll order a bunch of food in and write checks. When was the last time your pizza guy verified your check was good? I don't even think they take checks anymore, actually.

So... I am assuming she started the new real estate job, some sales didn't go through as expected, so she couldn't pay back the real estate commission agency, so they sued her, and maybe meanwhile she had written a bunch of checks against her projected earnings.

I guess you shouldn't go into a commission-based business unless you have a decent savings account.

I agree w/ you guys that I did the right thing (and thanks for the support), but I still feel bad for her. But also mad at her. But definitely bad for her too.

6:46 AM  
Blogger Kyla said...

You are sweet. :) I'm sure I would feel similar if I was involved, but since I'm not I can be the "Too bad for her." person on the outside of it all. But you are so sweet for caring about her, despite what happened. Very sweet indeed.

She needs to declare bankruptsy and start over...when you get in a hole like that you have to decide to climb out however you can.

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't feel guilty. It wasn't a personal attack,just biz. I think that is especially hard for child care providers. You're job is to relate to the child and family. How do you then step back into business mode? But you did the right thing.

8:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's presicely because people like you have sympathy for young mothers that this young mother has taken advantage in every situation she possibly could. You didn't do this to her. She did this to herself.

My husband just started a commission based job and our savings is skimpy. We have a backup plan in place that we hope not to have to use (401K money) but I can see how easy it is to expect some things (like my husband's former company to pay him the bonuses he's owed, which, grrrr). It's scary. But on the other hand, we wouldn't have decided for him to leave his job if the potential to make more money, and the track record of existing salesmen wasn't something we could keep up with.

Even if we got desperate, I don't think I could do to someone what she's done to you. Nope.

2:13 PM  

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